Nowhere Girl (Foundlings Book 1) Page 15

  I barely glanced at him. “Then stop watching me.”

  “I can’t legally do that,” he scoffed. “Jameson, sit down.”

  Elizabeth stepped into the room, a tray of iced tea lemonades balancing between her arms.

  “I’m an adult,” I grumbled.

  “It also states in our legally binding contract to keep you in our care until the trial has ended.”

  “Hello, boys,” she attempted to soften the tangible friction between us. “It’s so hot out there. I thought you could use a drink.”

  “Elizabeth,” Thomas said, “Jameson needs our help.”

  “Oh?” Her face perked up as she was called upon for support. “What’s going on, darling?”

  “He wants to date Sophia.”

  “No. Absolutely not,” Elizabeth blurted. “Jameson…do you have any idea what that would do to her? Not even us or you, but to her?”

  “Exactly my point,” Thomas groaned, rubbing his thin fingers along his chin as though deep in thought. “Jameson, if you date someone, she’s going to start asking questions and you’ll have to tell her about you because your heart is too big to lie.”

  “Thomas, I have been lying for so long that I don’t even know what’s true anymore. Is this really my hair? Am I really this old? Is today even Thursday?”

  “If you let this girl in,” Thomas snarled at me, “we can’t protect you anymore. If you tell her who you are, you’re opening up her life to your own harm and our resources will only extend to you, Jameson.”

  “That’s cruel.”

  “That’s the legal system.”

  “Boys,” Elizabeth moaned. “Jameson, what Thomas is trying to say is that if you let this girl into the real world here, she won’t be safe anymore.”

  The clinking sound of the massive diamond and gold bracelets on her puny wrist distracted me.

  “Jameson,” Thomas’s tone was now subdued. “I’m trying to protect you.”

  “Who’s going to protect her?”

  “If you tell her the truth? Nobody.”

  “I will.”

  “Jameson.” Elizabeth’s hands lifted to my shoulders. “Keeping her out of this is protecting her.”

  “You’re ludicrous,” I snarled, unable to prevent the venom from oozing out of my mouth.

  I couldn’t believe how absolutely cold and soulless Thomas and Elizabeth were. Naturally, he was a huge ass because his profession trained him to be that way, but the fact he was refusing to even acknowledge I cared for Soph, that really pissed me off. I wanted to break something. I wanted to throw the stupid vase behind Elizabeth and jump all over the shards of glass, while screaming at them. I needed to get out of there.

  “Where are you going?” Thomas demanded from me as I began leaving the room. Like I would tell him! I flew through the house, grabbing my wallet and keys from the round table in the foyer, before running out to my car. I peeled out, not even glancing behind me to see if they followed. I doubt they did. They were hoping I’d do the right thing and come back, but our versions of right weren’t mirrored.

  ***

  The wind was sweeping its violent warning against my face, blowing the storm in from the Gulf while I stood in frozen angst. I swiped the screen of my phone, scrolling through to Soph’s name. I started typing a message, but my fingers were actually shaking. They were shaking…like a nervous kid!

  Me: Awake?

  I waited. She didn’t respond. Seven minutes. Ten minutes. Crap. I should just go ho—

  Soph: Yes.

  Me: Come to your window.

  I stared at the panel, my heart pounding through my t-shirt. It wasn’t until I saw Soph’s sleepy face against the glass that I realized my breathing had stopped in anticipation. Her eyes were squinting in the dark, trying to find me on the small stretch of brown grass outside of her window.

  I lifted my cell phone so she could focus on the light and I then saw that smile stretch across her face, lifting her perfect cheeks as she noticed me. Soph waved for me to go around to the front—and my feet had never moved so quickly. I was practically dancing, waiting at her front door. My feet couldn’t stop moving. I needed to see her again. The interior door opened and I watched with excitement as she fumbled with the screen door; the final barrier between us.

  “Crap,” she muttered, struggling to unlock the door. She was so tired. I realized I’d woken her on a weeknight, just because I selfishly needed to see her.

  “Soph,” I whispered through the screen before she finally opened the door. I engulfed her, almost suffocating her just to hold her, to breathe her, to know she was there. I could hear her muffled giggle as her small hands wrapped around me in return. Yes.

  “Jameson,” she grunted. “Can’t. Breathe.”

  “I’m sorry.” I barely pulled away from her and kissed her forehead, able to inhale the scent of her hibiscus shampoo. “I just really needed to see you.”

  “Do you want to come in again?” she asked, her blue eyes smiling, opening more of herself to me.

  I nodded and released my hold around her body, but grabbed Soph’s hand as she closed the doors again and guided me to her bedroom. Soph fell almost immediately on her back against the mattress with exhaustion. I felt terrible.

  “I woke you up,” I groaned. “I’m so sorry, Soph.”

  “I’m glad you did.”

  “Yeah?” I sat next to her, in the same spot as the previous night. The previous night.

  “Yeah,” she repeated, turning on her side to face me. “What’s wrong?”

  Her right palm found my face, resting against my cheek with worry. She was worried about me.

  “I got in a fight with my aunt and uncle tonight. It’s nothing. I just wanted to be with you. We can just sleep…Soph? Soph?”

  I glanced down at her, grabbing onto the hand against my face, noticing Soph’s lips were parted. Her breathing was slower, almost robotic. She was asleep. Soundly. In my arms. Kissing Soph’s hand, I regretfully let it slip from my face, and leaned down to quickly kiss her lips. They were soft, almost familiarly comforting. She shifted, smiling in her sleep, and squishing her body tightly against mine. She is so beautiful.

  ***

  I left before dawn, woken by the screaming seagulls who began their morning ritual against the pier. Soph’s aunt hadn’t arrived, so my departure was only quickened by the thought of returning to Thomas and Elizabeth’s wrath. I figured the sooner I could get that over with, the better. Or, maybe not. I hated leaving Soph. Her eyes were fluttering, her smile still spread across her perfect mouth. But I had to. It was Thursday. One more week.

  I parked my car on the driveway in my usual spot, but decided to visit the beach before facing Thomas. The sun was rising behind me as I faced the Gulf, almost blown over by the impending storm. The wind was powerful, ominously strong. I sunk onto one of the patio chairs, digging my feet into the sand. I should have stayed with Soph.

  “You need to end it,” Elizabeth’s hushed whisper pierced the silence above my ear. “You need to protect her, and ending this fling, this crush, whatever it is, that’s the only way you can really do that.”

  “You’re insane,” I almost growled through my clenched teeth.

  I had never wanted to turn around and push Elizabeth, but in that moment I would have done almost anything to gain her support. She knelt at my side, the steam from her morning coffee drifting into my nostrils.

  “I’m not, but Jamie, this is serious. Thomas isn’t going to give you the time to figure out your feelings. I would like to do that, but I am so limited. Just let me say one thing.”

  “What?” I closed my eyes, hoping to hold onto the memory of Soph’s arm wrapped around me as she slept so peacefully at my side all night, the way her long hair fell over her face and covered everything but her delicate mouth, the occasional giggle that would escape during a happy dream…

  “Jamie.” Her sigh disturbed my peace. “You’re in witness protection. Think about that, honey. Until
your trial is over and every one of those bastards are put away, you’re not even safe. The system is corrupt, and I feel terrible that I can’t do more to protect you but, even as Jameson Burke, you’re not safe. Sophia won’t be safe. If you’re her protector, then protect her.”

  They were right.

  I had to protect Sophia, and the only way I could really, truly keep her safe from my world and from the weight and implications of my emotional baggage was to keep her away from me, officially.

  The realization of this broke me, leaving my heart and body devastated and unstable. I hated Thomas and Elizabeth for their condemnation, but it wasn’t their fault. They were doing their job, trying to keep me together.

  I needed to leave Sophia to protect her.

  Nobody else would protect her. Nobody could.

  I was going to be sick.

  CHAPTER

  TWENTY-SEVEN

  SOPHIA

  I was late for first period, victim to a dead cell phone. I didn’t even have time to think about how happy I felt, knowing Jameson had been with me overnight. My day began with a smile and frantic butterflies, even if I was running behind. My heart was vibrating beyond my ribs. I was so excited to see him. This was a new excitement, a foreign feeling that caused me to stumble and shake like never before.

  I liked someone. I liked Jameson.

  I hardly squeezed into French before our teacher, who was also arriving late. Perhaps we were both sabotaged by our cell phone providers. Olivia spun around in her chair, staring at me.

  “I’m okay,” I whispered. Her brow met with suspicion before she slowly turned around.

  “Hey,” Derek whispered from Olivia’s side.

  Without turning around, I quickly waved my fingers over my shoulder so he’d leave me alone and not cause our teacher’s attention to stop on me. The duration of class was spent reviewing the exam. I was ready. I didn’t need to study with Derek and Olivia on Saturday, but this new friendship thing was getting in the way of my avoidance.

  “So what happened to you last night?” Olivia mumbled while she stuffed her textbook back into her turquoise bag. I barely glanced at her while she spoke, already feeling the butterflies.

  “You didn’t answer my text messages,” she pressed. “And I saw you leave with Jamie after school. I’m only saying this as your friend, but I want to make sure you’re okay.”

  “I’m okay.”

  “We were this close to plotting his murder the last time we talked about him.” Her fingers pinched in front of her tiny nose. “You’re sure you’re okay?”

  I nodded, rolling my eyes and joining her as we filtered from the classroom. Derek was already gone, leaving me with Olivia as we walked down the hall together.

  “I think I’m okay,” I sighed. “I’m sorry about your messages. I just fell asleep.”

  “Whoa.” She giggled. “What happened?”

  “Nothing,” I argued. “We talked. Literally. And then he sort of…”

  “He sort of…what?” she probed, placing her hand on my shoulder. I couldn’t finish. Mr. Fitzgerald approached us with his gaze directed toward me.

  “Good morning, ladies, I need to borrow Sophia for the next period.”

  Olivia nodded, releasing her hold on me, and slinked away, all while raising her brows at me. I knew that wasn’t the end of this discussion. Mr. Fitzgerald was already walking back into his counseling office when Olivia vanished and I could catch up with him.

  “We didn’t get to meet last week,” he commented as we approached his office door, “And there are some things I need to talk to you about…it’s not too serious, but we should talk.”

  “Okay…” I dropped my bag on the floor in front of his small couch, wondering how much of my algebra review I would be missing, before plopping myself onto the soft cushions and waited for Mr. Fitzgerald to take his seat across from me in his desk chair.

  His right leg lifted, ankle resting against knee. Mr. Fitzgerald’s eyes peered over his lenses, cautiously watching me.

  “Sophia.” The fingers of his right hand grazed his mouth, as though he was debating his thoughts. “I spoke to some contacts I know at the University of South Florida in Tampa, Eastern Florida State College, and the University of Mobile in Alabama.”

  “You’re trying to get rid of me?”

  He smiled. “Well…no, but yes. I’m eager to make sure you get into one of these schools. We don’t have a lot of time and I’m trying to find a spot, trying to find somewhere that will accept you.”

  “I don’t want to stay around here,” I whispered. “I’ve been counting down the days before I can leave.”

  “Oh? Where are you going?”

  “I don’t know. Minnesota? New Jersey? Nevada? Anywhere but here. No offense.”

  Mr. Fitzgerald nodded, accepting my words. “The thing is, Sophia, I talked with the police and one of your aunt’s lawyers earlier in the week. They all need you to remain local.”

  “Why?”

  Blood drained from my face in one swift tidal wave of fear. I had been counting the days. I was practically in the territory of counting down the minutes, for heaven’s sake. He didn’t get it. Nobody did. I was going. I had to.

  “Well…” His ankle fell to the floor as he leaned forward, resting his elbows against his knees. “It’s just for a year. Maybe you can transfer after that? Sophia…you should stay with your aunt for a while longer. Wait for more time to pass. Let her keep an eye on you.”

  “What?”

  “Think about it. I’ll keep talking to who I know here in Florida and I just need you to keep an open mind.”

  My eyes rolled with newfound disdain. Yanking my bag and body away from his couch, I sulked out of his office and faced the rest of my day.

  ***

  My fingers were starting to tremble, occupying the unstructured time before seventh period with a feverishly tapping pen.

  “Whoa.” Derek’s hand cupped mine against my desk. “What’s going on? You practicing for band or something?”

  “I’m just ready to go home.”

  “Well, tapping a hole through your desk and making my ears bleed won’t get us home any faster,” he teased, releasing my hand and turning around as Mrs. Calvin entered the classroom.

  I glanced to the doorway—waiting, hopeful, and equally disappointed as the door clicked shut and our lesson began. I didn’t want to seem too clingy, but maybe a text would be okay. I reached into my bag and swiped my screen open, entering my password and sending a message to Jameson.

  Me: You’re missing our BL review. We won’t be able to study together.

  Jameson: @ Home. Sick.

  And that was all I got, the only message he sent me that entire day. After he woke me from my sleep, pulled some Romeo and Juliet stuff, and I fell asleep on him in my bed…again…And all I get was him leaving in the middle of the night and one minimal, pathetic text message. Did I do something wrong?

  “Put your phone away.” Derek laughed, peering back at me. “You’re going to miss the review. I know my notes are stellar, but they won’t help you much if you aren’t even paying attention.”

  “Sorry,” I mumbled, dropping my phone into my bag and returning my distracted attention to the front of the room. What did I do?

  ***

  Thursday night quickly bled into Friday morning, although I barely noticed the transition while my overtired eyes stared at my blank phone, willing Jameson to respond. This was new territory for me—I didn’t do friends, I didn’t do people, and I certainly didn’t date. But now, he wasn’t talking to me at all. He wasn’t at school. He was ignoring me…or something. Either way, my stomach had begun twisting into knots at the thought of how careless I had been by lowering my wall to him. This is why I don’t do people. I always end up hurt.

  When lunch rolled around, I was already begging for the weekend to come and go. One more week. That was all. By that time next week, I could leave. Not according to Mr. Fitzgerald.

&
nbsp; “Hey,” Luke distracted me. “Are you okay, Sophia? You’re just…sitting there.”

  “Huh?”

  “He’s referencing the fact you’re sitting there, staring at your lunch bag, not talking to any of us,” Michelle teased, nudging my shoulder with hers as she sat next to me.

  I hadn’t even noticed Michelle and Olivia join Luke and me at the lunch table. My eyes lifted upward, observing their eyes glued to me.

  “I’m okay.”

  Olivia pursed her lips. “You’re not. What’s going on?”

  “She needs to graduate. Same as the rest of us.” Michelle laughed. “Which reminds me! Party at my place next Wednesday after exams. You coming?”

  “Yes,” Olivia cheered, nudging me with her shoulder. “Sophia?”

  “I…”

  Luke blurted, “Don’t even. Nope. You’re going. I’ll pick you up if I have to.”

  I hated how these people thought they could force me into doing things I didn’t want to do, but I hated myself even more for my inability to say no.

  ***

  Before turning the corner toward British Lit, my stomach dropped and I could feel the tickle in my throat like it was going to begin suffocating me into a full-blown panic attack.

  “Sophia?” Derek stood behind me. “Are you okay?”

  “Um…”

  “Hey.” His head bent to be at my level while his eyes studied my face.

  I felt so embarrassed. It was all so ridiculous.

  “Sophia, are you feeling okay?”

  “No,” and it wasn’t a lie. “I just need a minute before going in.”

  “I’m waiting with you.”

  Derek’s hands held the straps of his backpack against his shoulders while we stood in silence, counting down seconds until the bell rang. I looked up at him, my eyes wary.

  “So we’re late.” He shrugged. “We can be late together.”